The Jokes On Babs

Summary:
December 22, 2014: The Joker is in Gotham and crosses Bab's path… what transpires….

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Mood Music:
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It's not well known, but Babs Gordon will sometimes leave the Clocktower and heads to a coffee shop just around the corner for a cup of tea and, obstensibly, some time out. It's not really time out, she's got her ever present tablet which is hooked into her network, and she checks it regularly. But, time away from the Clocktower can help clear her mind and give a different perspective on things.

So it is today, she's been in and had her cup of tea and is now just exiting said coffee shop, moving slowly up the street back towards the Clocktower. Gothams Information Goddess appears to be distracted, flicking her eyes to the tablet in her lap and then back up to make sure she's not going to run into anything.

***

The Joker is up on a rooftop overlooking the a side road. He's not really sure what the Bat sees in this. It's boring. Unless you like people watching which on reflection he kind of does. He likes to look down and imagine all the mayhem he could perpetrate on the good (and not so good) people of Gotham. He's also thinking, since he's in one of those phases. There's a lot of interconneccted strands here that may add up to some interesting times. The Joker may be crazy but he isn't stupid.

A flash of red hair in a wheelchair down the side road catches his eyes. Aaaaah. There's a familiar face. With a grin he moves to a slightly lower building and waits until Babs passes near.

"Been a while, hasn't it Miss Gordon. How's Daddy dearest? Holding up with not being the comissioner anymore, mmmm?"

***

Babs freezes, her breath hitching at the familiar voice. A voice she hears in her nightmares, a good reason she doesn't sleep all that much and why Fenris finds she has interesting dreams to hunt, as a result. Looking around, the wheelchair bound woman swallows visibly trying to find where the voice is coming from. Ah…. there he is "Not long enough, it seems" she replies in a voice gone hoarse.

***

"Aaaah fear. You know, that's kind of the best kind of compliment really. Being scared. It's flattering. Heart warming even. I wonder how often you've had nightmares of me coming back to finish the job. And you wonder, is today the day the nightmare comes true?" There's a low, manic laugh from the green haired man that can't be remotely sane.

"Not to worry. I'm not here to 'finish' anything. Seems I may not have to the way things are going in this city."

***

A figure decked in red and black with yellow accents lingers on a rooftop about a block from Babs and the Joker. Behind a black hooded cowl, his eyes squint to bring the scene into focus. His jaw sets tighter and for a moment he hesitates. With his heart pounding in his chest, he shakes his head. "No one hurts our family," he murmurs to himself.

His black booted feet fall silently against the ledge of the roof, and the teen sprints forward, arms pumping furiously at his sides.

The batarang that flies towards the Joker from just above. The black cape catches the wind and flies behind him.

The figure's shadow casts down on the street below, cape sailing behind him, flapping like a flag. "Leave her alone Joker," Robin states flatly.

***

Even a 'career' vigilante with a pathological obsession for justice can't run around in costume ALL the time. There's bills to pay, food to eat, nightmares to have, and research to do. And when libraries have metal detectors, well, good luck smuggling in the Ripper costume, given the large sword that goes with it. So for once the young man with the cold eyes is left without his disguise as he walks down the street, heading back home.

David tries to keep his eyes open for anything. Particularly threats, but unusual things count. And watching some lady in a wheelchair talking to thin air qualifies. Coming to a standstill, he turns his head to more openly look at her, trying to figure out what is going on, though he's too far away to make out the words being spoken. He DOES spot what looks like a shadow, however, so he starts crossing the street for a closer look.

***

"You can try…" Babs struggles for her composure, but really this disguise is one of the best she's ever donned. That of a scared, disabled woman… and now she's being harassed by a maniac. "The only thing I dream of…" and her statement is cut short by Robins(?) entrance and she looks at his shadow on the ground allowing her hair to fall forward. The look of relief will be shielded by the red curtain it presents. She's not realised that David is there or crossing the street yet.

***

"Ah the Bird returns. Not flown south for the winter I see. Nice to see ya." The Joker gives Robin a wave. He's not visibly armed but… well Robin should know better by now. Neither is he particularly menacing Babs with anything other than his presence, from atop a building. "You know it's a good thing you're here. Barbara and I were just going to talk about the deplorable state of the GCPD. Why, they're not even taking criminals you capes bring into 'em anymore." His grin splits wider. "That must sting, eh? I wonder what your dear ol' Dad would have to say about that, Barbara."

***

Robin remains where he is, positioned on the rooftop casting a menacing shadow below. Maybe he's finally learning from Batman, or maybe he's just better positioned here for now. Whatever the reason, he's staying where he is. His eyes tick towards Babs for a moment only to drift back to the Joker, "And here I thought you had some semblance of a conscience," he clucks his tongue, "taking to picking on disabled women seems beneath you." If anything can be beneath him. He clears his throat, "What do you mean not taking criminals?"

***

And now David is hearing voices too. He fears that it is a sign his tenuous grip on sanity has been lost, though fortunately the fear is short lived as he remembers that the wheelchair-bound woman is hearing it too. Once he is all the way across the street and not half a dozen yards away from Barbara he spots the shadow and pieces together at least some of what is going on. Why people are talking to her from the nearby rooftop, he has no idea. But she looks very unhappy about it.

The scarred young man leans over in a very casual manner towards the woman, stage whispering, "Is this a private conversation with God, or can anybody speak?"

***

Babs head snaps up, as much as in terror as shock at Davids' words "Oh… just go… you shouldn't be here." and then she looks at him. Yes, Babs recognises the scarred young man but hopefully that doesn't register on her face. "He's not god" the woman nearly snarls "He's more of the devil… but really, you should go." Her eyes flick towards where she thinks Robin is and back to The Joker. Falling silent, she lets Robin do the talking for the time being, her hands clenching the arm of her chair, knuckles turning white.

***

The madman with the green hair chuckles low, fiddling with a small boxy device that he produces from his jacket. He can see the terror on Bab's face from here, and he relishes it. "Oh, you hadn't heard? Tut tut Bird, that's very sloppy. You really should do more follow up on the hoods you beat up and bring in. The GCPD isn't taking them anymore. Not a one. Hasn't been for weeks. They're all getting routed to the Gotham SRD and going, oh, who knows where…"

Another laugh from the Joker, this one amused and rather cruel. "Which is funny because as I recall the SRD doesn't have peace officer status. Actually their legal status in general is kind of tenuous but they certainly don't have the authority to hold anyone anywhere. Or even transport, really." The Joker's quite right about that. See previous note about crazy but not stupid. Criminals the SRD catch should go to the police or federal authorities depending.

"Pity really. There go their arrest rates, mmm Barbara. Those capes were doing half the work and the GCPD can be so very… lax about these things."

***

The information is met with bird-stoicism and the simple response. "In case you didn't notice, I took a hiatus. As you said, Birds fly south for the winter." Pause. "Turns out Florida isn't all it's cracked up to be," there's a playful lilt to his voice, particularly as the snark feels so natural. His body doesn't move, however, as he processes the information about the GCPD.

'So enlighten me. Why would it happen — from your altogether wise, illustrious, and informed perspective, oh great and powerful Oz?" he deadpans. Changes in time create changes in attitude, it would seem.

***

Outwardly, the mundane looking young man doesn't react much to Babs' urgent plea. Really, it looks like he's pretty much dismissing her. Inwardly though his anger is building to furious levels. She obviously feels threatened - and from what he has managed to hear of the conversation, he has recognized the Joker's most famous victim. He wishes he had his costume with him: he'd go after the madman right there and then. Really, he'd consider doing it even without the costume, if not for how dangerous the poster child for Arkham Asylum is. Now it is HIS knuckles that are turning white, though from Barbara's angle it is obvious fury and nothing else is responsible - the cold eyes are blazing with a thwarted urge to lash out.

"Nah. I'm pretty happy right here," he says with deliberate casualness to the woman, turning his gaze up towards the rooftop dwellers. And then, very deliberately, he waves at the Joker. It looks very friendly, in fact!

***

The scarred young mans' anger worries Babs "Please, don't goad him. You really should go. The cape has this covered." she murmurs. She might be The Jokers most famous victim, but not his only. The battle for her composure is nearly won, her face transitioning to that cool, calm mask that Oracle often wears although her hands still grasp at her chair. Her eyes flick between Robin and The Joker, she's still not saying anything, Robins doing a good enough job.

***

"Maybe because your precious system has more holes than swiss cheese in a mouse pen?" The Joker shrugs, giving David a finger-wave with one hand. Hello there fellow crazy person. "Maybe someone in the SRD wants something? Maybe someone finally decided that you defenders of 'law' and 'justice'…" The air quotes there are easy to hear. "… aren't all you're cracked up to be. Since, you know, it's just the hoods you folks bring in that disappear. And I do mean disappear." Obviously the Joker hasn't tried too hard to find them. He doesn't really care in the end except for how he can use it, but it's good taunting material for these straight laced types.

***

There's a sharp cluck of Robin's tongue. "Riiiiiight," of course there's holes in the system. Without them, the Bats would have no reason to exist. Red Robin steps closer to the edge. "Basically, great and powerful Oz, you're suggesting the system needs a brain. Or something." His eyebrows tick upwards, not that anyone can tell behind the cowl. It is the ultimate equalizer for him. There's a long pause, however, at the last, and Robin jumps down a single rooftop, maintaining some distance still, but closing it enough to feature some of the details of the new uniform. "So the folks we apprehend are going missing?" that is cause for concern.

***

As Joker is not lying in a pool of his own blood, David is forced to silently disagree with Ms. Gordon's definition of "covered." Instead, he just tells the woman out loud, though in a voice mainly for her ears, "I'm not goading him! We're friends now, see? He waved back!" His voice sounds sincere enough, but the expression on his face belays the sarcasm behind it. Besides, he too is interested in hearing about people going missing, so he decides, amazingly enough, to shut up and listen for a few moments.

***

Babs brain is clearing and starting to process properly and her eyes flick to Red Robin momentarily before she returns her attention to David. She might have been about to chide him, but he falls silent and she nods in approval. Red Robins doing a great job and Babs doesn't really see the need to engage her tormentor further, so she listens as one hand moves towards the tablet on her lap.

***

The Joker whistles a jaunty little tune. "Y'know Barbara, I think there's an echo in here. Does he just follow Batman around repeating him too?" The Joker flicks a little tab on that short box he has in his hand and it suddenly becomes apparent that it's a detonator of some kind.

"I'm not suggesting the system needs a brain. I'm suggesting that it has one. A Strange one. That's doing Strange things. That aren't legal." His grins sharpens. "And may even be nefarious. And you have no idea how happy that makes me. It's almost like someone's helping me prove my point."

He sighs happily. "How's your Dad, Barbara? It's been a long time since we talked. Maybe I should go see him. For old time's sake."

***

There's a flatness to Robin's tone and he states, "Yeaaaah. In this story book, I'm Dorothy. Don't talk to the redhead, your business is explaining Oz to me, oh wonderful wizard." He clears his throat at the notion of repeating whatever Batman says and that actually wins a lopsided grin. "Sure. But Batman is a man of few words, a lot less to repeat." Time away has granted perspective, and Tim isn't easily baited this time.

"And what's your point, exactly? That you can make this city a disaster zone? That you can make things less shiny? That the rest of us are just as deranged as you?"

***

While silent, David goes over his inventory again in his head, tallying up useful gear or weapons. Thanks to the metal detector, all he can come up with is his belt and a cheap pen. Given the Joker is still 3 stories up, well… he removes the cap from the pen in his pocket. Just in case. "Don't worry," he says softly to Babs, his tone flat to the point of unreadable. "I am in situations like this all the time." When he spots something in the Joker's hand, he glances over at the redhead and speaks again. This time he asks her a question, and there is a hint of genuine awkwardness. "You haven't, uh, left your chair unattended at some point recently, have you?"

***

Babs has noticed what's in The Jokers hand and she shakes her head at Davids question "Not his style" she murmurs and glances around. "And I do worry. Young men shouldn't be in situations like this all the time" she reprimands in a sharp tone. Babs can't help it. Red Robins attempts to keep The Jokers attention on him are met with a small smile and the redhead will still not respond to the maniac on the roof.

***

The Joker chuckles. "If you don't understand you're never going to get it. Not that this surprises me Bird. You don't get most things. Must have something to do with your parents. I should have Harley come by. Analyze you at some point. She'd enjoy that."

He shakes his head. "You put your lives into cleaning this city up. But your own police force is making it dirtier faster than you can clean. Best. Punchline. Ever."

***

"Yeah, cause he's /way/ too classy to use an exploding whoopy cushion," the dark haired man murmurs testily. Something tugs at his brain in that moment, and he glances down at her again, but this time her face. She's handling this a lot better than he figured someone with her history should be. Apparently being a cop's daughter counts for quite a bit more than he thought. His eyes turn away from her finally, looking back up at the two men high above. His voice turns cold, to the point of uncaring or even harsh - his natural speaking voice, as she would have heard in her conversation with him as Oracle. "It keeps me busy."

***

And The Joker has just said what Babs has been thinking for a while. It's the reason she was happy for Bobby and Midnighter to take on the meta kidnapping issue… who do they trust. Just because Babs has regained composure doesn't mean she's not screaming internally but if she's fooled David, maybe she's fooled The Joker too. Looking between the three men, one her tormentor, she says coldly "I'm done with this discussion." and starts to move off down the street. Let The Joker make of this what he will.

***

The Joker straightens out. "Mmmmmm. Now that I think about it, I am too. But I have the feeling you'll be having it again. Not with me, oh no. I doubt that. But with Stranger folk. See you 'round Barbara. And say hi to Daddy dearest for me."

The madman gives one more wave to David and disappears from view.

***

And just like that, the situation kind of… ends. David can't quite come to think of it as actually resolved. He does put on a fake yet convincing smile as he waves back to the Joker. Then he stands around looking like an idiot for a few moments, torn between his default setting of See Problem Use Violence and trying to decide what would actually be best for the victim in the situation. Eventually his logic forces down his rage and he turns to follow after Barbara. It's in the opposite direction he wants to go, but making sure somebody doesn't get murdered is more important than anything else he might have to do right now.


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